…and I mean that quite literally. Let me explain: I work in a fairly small office: sixteen employees, thirteen women, three men. There’s an ongoing bathroom etiquette problem that never gets talked about, never addressed, and most certainly never resolved.
Somebody keeps pissing all over the toilet. Yeah, you heard me. Not just on the rim around the bowl, either. It’s on the floor and everything. Every day, several times a day.
It’s pretty obviously a male culprit. And there are only three of us. My fear is that the female majority may think I’m to blame. But what am I supposed to do? Approach each of them and proclaim proudly that I am not the reckless urinator? It already sucks being one of the only guys in this estrogen fishbowl, but this just makes it ten times worse.
So almost every day I saunter into the bathroom for my morning wee, and find myself faced with splotches of dark yellow piss sprinkled around like fucking fairy dust. Naaaaasty. So what do I do? I clean it up, naturally, because if somebody hits the bathroom right after me, they’re gonna think I did it, which is unacceptable. Talk about a rock and hard place.
I finally went to my supervisor about it, who basically laughed it and has no intention of doing anything about it. I even designed a sign we could hang above the toilets:
The answer was NO. I’m wondering if filing a hostile-work-environment grievance is the way to go. Somebody’s gotta do something. I’m not a janitor, fer chrissakes!
It’s one of the other two guys here. It could be either of them. It could be both, I dunno. But either way… it sucks. It’s most definitely a pisser of epic proportions.
Sounds like an episode of The Office just waiting to happen, doesn’t it? I’d write it myself, but I’m pretty sure they have a closed circle of writers on staff. And now that the writer’s strike is over, I imagine they’re writing like crazy over there.
Somebody keeps pissing all over the toilet. Yeah, you heard me. Not just on the rim around the bowl, either. It’s on the floor and everything. Every day, several times a day.
It’s pretty obviously a male culprit. And there are only three of us. My fear is that the female majority may think I’m to blame. But what am I supposed to do? Approach each of them and proclaim proudly that I am not the reckless urinator? It already sucks being one of the only guys in this estrogen fishbowl, but this just makes it ten times worse.
So almost every day I saunter into the bathroom for my morning wee, and find myself faced with splotches of dark yellow piss sprinkled around like fucking fairy dust. Naaaaasty. So what do I do? I clean it up, naturally, because if somebody hits the bathroom right after me, they’re gonna think I did it, which is unacceptable. Talk about a rock and hard place.
I finally went to my supervisor about it, who basically laughed it and has no intention of doing anything about it. I even designed a sign we could hang above the toilets:
PLEASE REMEMBER….
ACCURACY
IS NEXT TO GODLINESS!
ACCURACY
IS NEXT TO GODLINESS!
The answer was NO. I’m wondering if filing a hostile-work-environment grievance is the way to go. Somebody’s gotta do something. I’m not a janitor, fer chrissakes!
It’s one of the other two guys here. It could be either of them. It could be both, I dunno. But either way… it sucks. It’s most definitely a pisser of epic proportions.
Sounds like an episode of The Office just waiting to happen, doesn’t it? I’d write it myself, but I’m pretty sure they have a closed circle of writers on staff. And now that the writer’s strike is over, I imagine they’re writing like crazy over there.
