Zac Attack!

Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a film lover. I lean toward the classics, particularly noir and sci-fi, as well as foreign (Bergman, Kurosawa, etc). I can't deny the fact that I’m a bit of a movie snob…. That is to say, I pretty much eschew most of the crap that gets churned out these days (I liken modern Hollywood to an overgrown retarded gorilla, gleefully tossing its feces around). I have a pretty big movie collection (over 600 DVDs and Blu-rays), which I suppose indicates some level of passion for the medium.

I’ve toyed with the idea of writing/posting movie reviews for a while now, and I’ve finally decided to give it a whirl. If nothing else, it’ll help pad out the blog, since I can’t seem to write on a consistent basis. I’m not a professional reviewer, and I don’t claim to be. I won’t be grading based on stars, or thumbs, or any other celestial objects or body parts. I think I’ll go with something simple… maybe a traffic light. Green means good, great, maybe even excellent. Yellow means somewhat good, but flawed. Red means awful, horrendous, don’t waste your time.

For my inaugural review, I’ll be taking a look at a film that falls into none of the preferred categories listed above. In fact, the film in question is, at a surface glance, exactly the type of movie I’d normally avoid like the plague. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you….

Wait! Before you run away screaming, just hear me out. You might be glad you did.

On the surface, 17 Again appears to be yet another empty-headed Disneyized teen comedy, a sugar-laden third-rate piece of shit. Au contraire, I say. It’s got a great cast, it’s consistently entertaining, frequently hilarious, and it manages a seemingly impossible feat: it makes Zac Efron likeable.

The plot concerns Mike O’Donnell (Matthew Perry), an unhappy guy in his late-30’s who, on the cusp of losing his wife and his career, is magically transformed into a teenaged version of himself (Zac Efron). I won’t reveal anything further. The less you know, the better.

The cast is uniformly marvelous. Matthew Perry, still (unfortunately) known best as Chandler Bing from Friends, is excellent (though his screen time is criminally short; more on this later). Thomas Lennon (you’ve probably seen him on Reno 911 or, more recently, as “Gay Doug” from I Love You, Man) literally steals every second of every scene he appears in. Melora Hardin, better known as the mega-bitch Jan from TV’s The Office, is quite good (the chemistry between she and Lennon is probably the single best thing in the entire film, particularly the dinner scene).

But these three are generally great in everything they do. Let’s talk about the big surprise of the film: Zac Efron. Yes, THAT Zac Efron (from the High School Musical… uh, movies. Yeah, I guess they’re technically movies). You know, the guy whose face adorns every pre-pubescent girl’s walls, clothes, and lunchboxes (my pre-pubescent girl included). In all honesty, had a less toxic young actor been cast, I probably wouldn’t have been so (initially) averse to seeing the film. But you know what? The kid’s a revelation in this role. In my second viewing (yes, I watched it twice), I noticed several occurrences of Efron mimicking Perry’s mannerisms (maybe not quite on the level of, say, Ewan McGregor mimicking Sir Alec Guinness as Obi-wan Kenobi, but you get my point). And damn it, Efron is just plain appealing to watch. He’s in almost every scene in the film, and I never got tired of watching him. I expected to hate the film, and hate Efron even more, and now I’m forced to reexamine my entire view of this guy. The cafeteria scene in particular is nothing short of brilliant, and Efron positively radiates confident cool.

Happily, the film’s humor is fairly mature and refreshingly unsanitized (this is probably not appropriate for young children, which might just devastate them because there’s no new High School Musical movie this year). Nothing really vulgar to report, but expect a number of “douche bags” in the dialogue, not to mention some mild sexual content. Oh, and if you’re at all into Star Wars or Lord of the Rings…. well, there are some pretty hilarious sight gags and references. The aforementioned dinner scene, in which Lennon and Hardin’s characters discover a common bond… oh my god, it’s hysterical, and executed perfectly.

I have one relatively minor complaint: I really wish Matthew Perry’s role was larger. He’s in the first fifteen minutes of the film, then completely disappears until the very end. It makes sense in context, since the majority of the story concerns his teenaged counterpart, but they could’ve done some sort of Quantum Leap effect, where we glimpse Matthew Perry here and there (reflected in mirrors, etc). As it stands, Matthew Perry’s role amounts to little more than a cameo, which is a shame. He’s a great actor who isn’t utilized nearly enough (probably the Friends curse).

Bottom line? 17 Again is a very funny film, not at all what I expected, and I’m happy to endorse it. Green light!

Blog Hard with a Vengeance

Ah, that wicked scoundrel Procrastination hath reared its ugly, acromegalic head once again. It’s been over a month since I wrote. Much has happened, so I’ll get right to it…

We Be Jammin'

Sierra and I used to make strawberry jam every summer when she was younger, but somehow the twisted tapestry of time has tripped us up for the last few years (wow, say that fast three times). But as spring gave way to summer, we vowed that this year would be different. This year, we’d return to our jam-making tradition and, on June 28, we did just that.

Predictably, the jam is delicious. Five batches! We’re planning to do a few more batches (including a strawberry-blueberry hybrid), and I really hope we do. The girl’s almost grown, so traditions like this may fall by the wayside, especially since she’ll be VERY busy after she graduates next spring. Which leads into my next topic….

Chef Sierra!

Sierra has been “conditionally accepted” into the Portland Art Institute’s culinary program, which is the same as being accepted, but since she applied early, she’s required to graduate high school first (well, duh). She’ll start her first term THREE WEEKS after graduation (June 2010), so this is her last full-on summer. She is absolutely thrilled, and I couldn’t be prouder of her. I can’t wait to see her in her chef’s outfit…

Moose Boy… or Moose Man?

In Isaac news… well, the (not so) little man turned 16 on July 20. And per household tradition, the big day was capped off by the world premiere of his birthday video: Isaac: Memoirs of a Moose Boy. It’s basically the same format as Logan’s video from April… two-plus hours of video clips and photo slideshows celebrating his first 16 years. And I’ve gotta say…. I’ve outdone myself once again as a video-production maestro. Hell, I should be doing this kinda shit for a living. Instead, I’m stuck chasing down deadbeats from behind a desk.

You Say Tomato, I Say…

Our Topsy Turvys have literally exploded with tomatoes. The heat wave a couple of weeks back definitely helped. I actually had to move them up to the top of the deck last night because they’d grown so long that the mongrel Bijou could reach them…. And yes, she was pulling tomatoes off the vines and playing with them. Damn dog. She also throws rocks into our swimming pool, but that’s another story for another time.